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How to be a better ally

In memory of Stephen Lawrence, Marsha Ramroop, 澳门王中王's former Director of Inclusion & Diversity offers practical steps on how we can all be better allies to those from underrepresented racialised groups 鈥 supporting our shared goal to create a fairer and more inclusive society.

21 April 2022

Stephen Lawrence was tragically murdered in a racist attack in 1993. An aspiring architect, he was unable to realise his ambition.

As racial discrimination continues to create barriers that perpetuate inequality, it鈥檚 critical that we as individuals take the time to assess what actions we can take to break them down, and tackle racism head on.

We recognise that at present our membership, the profession, and wider built environment sector is not representative of the society we serve. It is overwhelmingly white, male, heteronormative, able-bodied and London-centric.听听

Whilst improving diversity is obviously crucial, so too is inclusion. So, what steps can we take?听

How do we acknowledge our own identities and take action to break down barriers, without taking up space, and listening to lived experiences?听听

This is what allyship is all about. So, pick up your CAMERA.

Courage

Saying you are an ally is far easier than being one. Recently in our for International Transgender Day of Visibility, she said:听听

"People often say to me the courage to be out as a trans person is amazing. Well, I think we're at a time in our society which actually takes more courage to be a trans ally.鈥 So trans people are incredibly grateful. We need your support if you're prepared to be visible as a trans ally, that's fantastic. You're prepared to be heard as a trans ally.鈥疉nd, if you're prepared to be seen in the same space as transgender people, that speaks volumes."听

This is also true of other issues, such as race and disability. To stand up and use your position, privilege, and voice for others is powerful for those who do not have that.听

You need to be prepared for the hurtful and challenging pushback, and do it anyway. You need courage.听听

Acknowledge privilege

Privilege is about unearned advantage. It鈥檚 not about money, or elitism necessarily. It鈥檚 not about what you have had to do to get where you are. It鈥檚 about understanding, seeing, and acknowledging what you鈥檝e not had to do or navigate. Structural, institutional, and societal racial discrimination is real. Some of us from racialised groups still don鈥檛 see or feel it. Sometimes that鈥檚 because the scales have yet to fall from our eyes, sometimes it鈥檚 because we鈥檝e not yet faced these barriers, because of our own access and ability to hold white spaces. That doesn鈥檛 mean it doesn鈥檛 exist in heavier doses for others.听听

If you鈥檙e white, you鈥檝e not had to face racism. Racism is a system. It plays out in discrimination based on not being white. Whiteness is a power position. So, as a white individual, you may have faced prejudice because of what you look like, but overall in societal structures, whiteness holds power, racialised people do not.听

So, whatever our background, if we鈥檙e white or non-white but still have privilege, we need to allow others to benefit from ours.听

Manage mistakes well

We all make mistakes, it鈥檚 how we handle them that matters. Being an ally doesn鈥檛 mean you鈥檒l always get it right. But when you don鈥檛, acknowledge the mistake. Listen to how you can do things differently. Learn from the experience, reflect on the feedback, and move forward differently, ever conscious of how to be better.听

Saying sorry, meaning it, and moving forward differently is an inclusion muscle that requires much exercise in order to strengthen; and like any exercise you鈥檙e not used to, it鈥檚 very uncomfortable at first, and it鈥檚 never truly easy, but it does get better the more you do it.听听

And, remember as an ally, the struggle for social and racial justice is not about you.听

Educate yourself

It鈥檚 not up to others to educate you about race and racism.听听

Take responsibility for reading, learning, being in spaces with those from racialised backgrounds, and listening and reflecting.听 There are a number of different 澳门王中王 Radio episodes to help with this, and this is challenging listening at times, but is very useful.听

Recognise and believe

Making behavioural changes to support others and being vocal about issues of social and racial justice doesn鈥檛 necessarily mean being an activist and campaigning. It鈥檚 about being cognisant that it's endemic in our society, and therefore, in our organisations there are structural biases. We must look to dismantle these. Therefore, the likelihood that a non-white person saying to you 鈥淚鈥檝e experienced racism鈥 and that experience being real, is extremely high. So, believe them.听

Remember, it鈥檚 not about intention, it鈥檚 about impact. Not many organisations or individuals set out to be discriminatory, but if the impact is discrimination we cannot deny this, and must create procedural changes to mitigate it.听

Advocate for others

Amplifying the voices and needs of others, especially when they鈥檙e not in the room, and before sharing your own, is a powerful tool of the ally.听

Think about those perspectives not apparent and share some of your knowledge based on your learning about the issues at play. Support those with lived experiences other than your own and vocally challenge those who shared prejudiced or biased thinking or behaviours.听

It鈥檚 not easy being an ally. It requires daily conscious work, and this is where Cultural Intelligence (CQ) 鈥 helps you to process the discomfort of these moments and work towards behaving more inclusively and vocally for others.听

This is your choice: pick up your CAMERA, apply your CQ lens, and take a deep look into the image of society you need to influence, remove the filters that have been shrouding your vision, open the aperture, and let the light flood in; or don鈥檛.听

Emeli Sande sings in Professor Green鈥檚 Read All About it Part III:听

You've got a heart as loud as lions听
So why let your voice be tamed?听
Maybe we're a little different听
There's no need to be ashamed听
You've got the light to fight the shadows听
So stop hiding it away听
Come on, come on鈥μ

Yeah, we're all wonderful, wonderful people听
So when did we all get so fearful?听
Now we're finally finding our voices听
So take a chance, come help me sing this听

Find your courage. Use your voice. Take the struggle as your own. Bear your mistakes. Take up the mantle. Hold up others.听听

And, come on. Come help me sing this, for yourselves. For society.听For Stephen.听听

Useful resources:

  • 澳门王中王 Radio - a series of podcasts focused on promoting diversity and inclusion within the architecture profession, underpinned by the key themes of CQ.
  • What White People Can Do Next: From Allyship to Coalition, Emma Dabiri, Penguin Books 2021听
  • We Wish We Knew What to Say: Talking with Children about Race, Pragya Agarwal, Dialogue Books 2020听
  • Demanding More: Why Diversity and Inclusion don鈥檛 happen and what you can do about it, Sheree Atcheson, Kogan Page 2021听
  • Forbes article: by Sheree Atchseon听听
  • Harvard Business Review: 听听

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